Parents instructed to “take back” control of their children

The message was clear: Indigenous children will remain in their communities.

“They grow up with that loving, growing bond. That the family is involved, that the community is involved. That we don’t give Alberta Child Services not one more of our children,” said Jo-Ann Saddleback.

Alberta apprehends more children than any other province, she said, and the majority of those children are Aboriginal.

Saddleback says her personal experience – similar to many other Aboriginal women - with the provincial and federal health systems spurred her on to work with Christine Sokaymoh Frederick to organize a conference to discuss raising children through Indigenous ways. At 19 years of age, Saddleback was counselled by a doctor to be sterilized.

“They don’t talk to non-Native women that way, but they did me. I spent a lifetime…begging forgiveness from the Creator, from my ancestors that I allowed that to happen to me,” she said. Saddleback married a man with six children.

Saddleback said the conference was an opportunity to open a discussion about raising children that needs to begin when couples are dating and when conception occurs, whether by accident or planned. It is a discussion that needs to include mothers learning to look after themselves both before and after the baby is born. It is a discussion that needs to include how to give birth.

And it is a discussion also about raising sons and keeping men involved as fathers, husbands and providers.

Samson Cree Elder Marilyn Buffalo said sons should not be seen as a liability.

“Usually if the ceremonies are done right by the men for the boys, the boys have a 99 per cent chance of survival. I really, really emphasize that because that’s where we’re weak. It’s not something that just happened over night. I think it happened because our men were robbed … of the right of living on the land and to hunt and to fish,” she said. “We’re suffering from that multi-generational damage.”

Mary McDermott, a Cree woman raised by her grandmother in Grouard, talked about the importance of providing men with employment counselling and opportunities.

“It gives them that sense of pride in being able to support their families,” she said.

Buffalo challenged those in the room to “revision (and) re-energize.” She said healthy people in the community will make the difference in raising children.

“You women and men have to take your role back. Nobody is going to give it to you. You have to take your role back as a parent,” she said. “You don’t take it back, no social worker has the authority to give it back to you. You have to go to that social worker, say, ‘I am the boss here. These are my babies. Here is the bond. This is what I want.’”

“We hope with this conference we have begun that discussion,” said Saddleback. “That we know how to find that forgiveness that we need, to be better parents, better grandparents.”

Photo caption: Marilyn Buffalo speaks as panelists (from left) Lana Whiskey Jack, Mary McDermott, Maxine Courtoreille-Paul, Waymatea Ellis and the audience listen on.