A second chance at life

Page 28

Family Violence

The children hug Willard Thompson around his knees, pulling him back and forth, in rhythmic time to music from the movie Aladdin in the background.

But life in the Thompson home has not always been so comfortable.

Only one year ago, Thompson's wife took their children and left. He was left alone with his anger, violence, and suicidal plans.

"I was behaving the way I thought was normal," said Thomspon. "When I was growing up, I saw my parents beat each other up, my dad punch my sisters through the wall. I saw my mom try to shoot herself, but my dad grabbed the gun away at the last minute. Then I saw him shoot himself. In my immediate family, eight people had committed suicide and four more had attempted it. I was just following the cycle."

Thomspon was raised on Carry-the-Kettle Reserve in southeast Saskatchewan. His family isn't the only one on the reserve struggling with generations of abuse, nor his reserve the only one with problems.

But Carry-the-Kettle is the first reserve to participate in a case study focusing on healing anxiety, depression, and the abuse which it can turn into.

Earlier this year, 30 people employed by the band participated in a group counselling program called '10 Days to Self Esteem'. It was run by Chris Sorenson, a University of Regina Masters student doing his thesis on the program's impact on a Native community.

The '10 Days to Self Esteem' is developed by Dr. David Burns, a renowned American psychologist and author. It is based on the principle that events create thoughts which create emotions. These emotions result in a certain behavior.

Sorenson explains the Burns technique.

"If someone bumps into me, I may think they're a miserable person for deliberately bumping into me," says Sorenson. "Then I may think this kind of thing always happens to me. When I think that, I'm using two types of mental distortions; mindreading, because I don't know what the other person was thinking; and black and white thinking, by saying it always happens to me. Those two distortions will make me feel upset."

"The first step of the program is to be aware of the thought. The second is to identify the distortion, which is what I just did. And the third step really involves just being able to dispute the distortions, take and rephrase the thought. I would then say to myself 'I've been bumped into, it's uncomfortable. I may want to ask the person what the situation is.' And then find out the reason they bumped into me had nothing to do with my immediate thoughts and emotions," explains Sorenson.

Sorenson began changing the behaviors of the group on Carry-the-Kettle reserve using this technique.

The first thing the group does in the program is measure their level of anxiety and depression, and symptoms of thought distortions.

The group has unbelievably high levels.

But after four difficult days, a sharp drop occurred in their scores, and continued throughout the program.

Sorenson was aware that people had experienced major changes by the questions they asked and how they behaved. But he had no idea how much.

He had been so busy just running the program that he had sent the data to Dr. Burns without looking at it closely.

Burns called up Sorenson in shock when he received the data at the end of the program.

Burns told him the scores showed the group's level of depression and anxiety had dropped 50%. This is unheard of in counselling circles.

Ivan Thomson, health coordinator on Carry-the-Kettle, also went thorough the program so he could asses its effectiveness.

Thomson wishes the reserve had access to the Burns program long ago. It makes him think about all the things that could have been different.

Willard Thompson uses stronger words.

"I feel like half my life has been wasted. Now I can start living the right way."

Thompson is back with his wife and children. They moved off the reserve so he can go to university full-time and pursue his lifelong dream of being an RCMP oficer.

He and his wife go through the Burns workbook together, so they can teach their children how to cope with small frustrations before they escalate into destructive behaviors.

"I can't even explain the change that we've had. It's unbelievable. It's a great feeling, an exciting feeling, like my heart just wants to blow up!" he exclaims. His words tumble out after each other and his usually calm face is bright with emotion.

"I never had an exciting feeling before, I had a hurt feeling. I'd go up and hit a wall, put a hole through it, break my hand. But now, I'm not even close to that."