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I've got a complaint about all those tabloid newspapers you find at the supermarket checkout counter - the ones with Hollywood gossip and wacko stories about two-headed babies. My complaint is not so much about the quality of the journalism in them, but the fact that they never have any stories about Native people.

There certainly is enough material for the tabloids to publish a Native edition. It could even be called the Native Enquirer. Here's what I think a typical issue of the Native Enquirer might be like:

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Leader of the Official Opposition

The response of the minister of Social Services and the government to the crisis in social assistance is severely inadequate. It will make this holiday season and the New Year one of the grimmest in recent history for next six per cent of Alberta's population.

Lost for 50 years Page 1 The American Museum of Natural History in New York houses what could turn out to be one of the major finds for Plains Indian people. The museum possesses a Cree medicine bundle. Its whereabouts has been unknown to the public for more than half a century.

On September 6, 1934, noted anthropologist David Mandlebaum wrote to his superior in New York that he would soon be leaving the Sweet Grass Reserve in Saskatchewan but, before departing, he would receive a bundle," a bearskin worn by a noted chief in the old days - Big Bear."

FORT CHIP CREE

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Mixed reactions have greeted the 12,280 acre land settlement of the Fort Chipewyan Band. The contract includes $26.6 million cash, mineral rights and hunting and trapping rights.

Local people have hailed the settlement as a reason to celebrate. Some others have been critical of the agreement and belittle it. Still others have both praised and censured the outcome.

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Ahneen, howdy and yo. And of course Happy New Year to you. If the toy companies do a major share of their business at Xmas, the swollen head pill people probably look forward to this time of year also. Many of the same folks who once sang out "ho, ho, ho," will spend most of January 1 whispering, "oh...oh...oh."

EDITORIAL

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The dawn of a new year is traditionally a time for reviewing the accomplishments and failures of the past year, and looking forward to doing better in the year ahead.

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The cut-off of funds for Status Indian students was the top item on the agenda at the most recent meeting of First Nations Confederacy in Ottawa.

The confederacy, an arm of the Assembly of First Nations, is protecting the Department of Indian Affairs' decision that November 1, 1986 would be the cut-off date for applications for funding for students commencing study in '87l.

As well as protesting the cut-off itself, the confederacy is questioning DIA's interpretation and administration of the cut-off order.

Traditional park rights, too

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The Cree Band of Fort Chipewyan, the province of Alberta and the federal government announced December 23 the conclusion of an agreement settling the band's claim...the largest outstanding treat lands entitlement claim in Alberta.

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What's the difference between a milkshake and a Native trapper? "Nothing," according to the animal rights movement. One of their screwball ideas is that it's barbaric to trap animals and milk cows. If they had their way, some animal rights activists would outlaw trapping and milking.

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OTTAWA - The federal government's new land claims policy is "a grave disappointment and an insult to the first nations," according to the Assembly of First Nations.

The AFN indicates it had expected that the government would upgrade its policy to enter into "truly comprehensive relations" with Aboriginal peoples. Instead, according to the AFN, "it now offers a process in which our benefit from the development of our land and resources is deliberately limited."